Planting without expecting growth
When we help others, it is often because we want to see them grow, thrive, and make meaningful progress in life. At least, that’s what it should be. But in reality, human motives are rarely that pure. Behind the scenes, help is sometimes laced with selfishness, fear, insecurity, ego, or power play.
People may offer assistance for many reasons. Some genuinely want to see you thrive. But others help to feel good about themselves or to maintain a sense of superiority. Their focus isn’t on the impact their support has on you—it’s on how it makes them feel: noble, needed, or important.
That’s why when you begin to grow, some people pull away. They never expected your progress to reach a certain level. Some become nervous because your independence threatens their relevance. Others feel insecure or even resentful when your success begins to match—or exceed—their own.
The Fear Behind Support
When people help you, they may unconsciously set limits on how far they want to see you go. If you surpass those limits, they may withdraw their support or even turn against you.
For some, their support was a way of staying in control. As long as you remained dependent, they felt powerful. But when your blessings begin to multiply, especially when you carry divine favour, your success may create fear, envy, or discomfort in those who helped you.
This is particularly true if you are someone who knows how to manage little and turn it into much. Like Jacob in Laban’s house or Joseph in Egypt, those with God’s blessing turn small resources into great results. That kind of growth unsettles people who never expected it and weren’t prepared for it.
A wise Ghanaian proverb says: “The one who climbs a good tree deserves to be pushed further up” (Nea oforo dua pa na yepia no). This reflects Jesus’ Parable of the Talents, where the servant who multiplied his talents was entrusted with more.
Unfortunately, not everyone will “push you up.” Insecure people may pull the ladder away instead. They see your rise as a threat to their position, not a reason to celebrate.
Isaac and Abimelek: A Biblical Example of Help Turned Sour
Genesis 26 offers a powerful example in the story of Isaac and Abimelek, king of the Philistines. Initially, Abimelek allowed Isaac to dwell peacefully in his land. He even issued protection, warning his people not to harm Isaac or his wife.
But then came the blessing of the Lord. During a time of famine, Isaac planted crops and reaped a hundredfold. His wealth grew so greatly that he became “very wealthy.” And then envy set in. The same people who once welcomed Isaac now asked him to leave. Why? “You have become too powerful for us.” (Genesis 26:16)
Isaac’s prosperity became a threat, and Abimelek’s support shifted into rejection. Isaac did nothing wrong. His growth simply made people uncomfortable. But later, recognizing God’s favor on Isaac, Abimelek returned with his officials to make peace. He admitted, “We saw clearly that the Lord was with you…” (Genesis 26:28–29). This proves that even well-intentioned people may become distant or fearful when your blessings grow beyond what they anticipated.
Gratitude and Balance
All this does not mean we should become suspicious of every helping hand. Nor should we become proud or ungrateful when we rise. On the contrary, gratitude is essential. When someone contributes to your progress, acknowledge it. Never repay help with arrogance or betrayal.
But at the same time, we must be discerning. Not all help is pure, and not all helpers expect you to grow. Understand that your growth can make people uncomfortable—not because you’ve done anything wrong, but because your blessing exposes their insecurity. In the end, God’s blessing is not meant to make people comfortable—it’s meant to make a difference.
